womens health magazine article

Menopause!

Menopause . . . Boy, I didn't know if I knew how to spell it, let alone talk about it.

But you know what? Somebody's got to. It's not an easy subject, and I'm thinking it's a pretty safe bet that some of you have walkedyour fingers to the delete button.

Well, STOP! Husbands, daughters, sons, brothers, sisters, special friends, whoever -- you have got to know about this too. Really . . . You've seen the little kitchen signs that say, *If the cook ain't happy, nobody's happy!* You know how true that is.

Never, never think *Well, that's HER problem.* Because it's not.

We all need to help each other. That's just how it is in the universe. Shrugging and leaving the room isn't going to cut it anymore. If someone isn't happy, guess what? If we have it in ourselves to help them, we'd better.

It doesn't matter what the problem is, big or small. It doesn't matter if the person who is having the problem isn't talking to you. It doesn't matter if you don't think you can help at all. What matters is that you try. The quicker you all start handling things properly, the easier it will be for her. Really, what's wrong with turning the heat down or the air conditioner up -- as in all things in life, it's only temporary. You get the

idea, right? If she broke her leg and was uncomfortable, you'd be doing these things for her, wouldn't you?

Now, here's what you can do, if you had a little *disagreement.* Do NOT, I repeat, do NOT leave the premises. You can go in the other room, but make little noises so it is known you ARE there for her if she needs you. You can go to that little quiet place within and ask for help in finding the right words to say or the right thing to do.

IF you absolutely feel that you would do more harm than good, stay in the little quiet place within until YOU feel the peace. That will make such a difference in the outcome. If you're thinking thoughts like *Why me? Why do I have to put up with this? Why can't SHE handle it on her own?* or anything anywhere near that, STOP. Take care of yourself until you are no longer saying those things. Find your peace, then help her with hers.

When it comes to menopause, we all need to know these facts: This will go away, but maybe not soon.

This is not about YOU.

This is not something she should have to handle alone.

This is something that has to be addressed, in a sensible and loving way, and whatever is done is done with love.

And especially don't ask her in front of everyone if she's having a hot flash when it's 85 degrees in the shade, or something equally ridiculous. Do not make a mockery of this unless you know she can deal with being laughed at. We all know, chances are, she wouldn't handle it like Mother Teresa would have.

Menopause. These could be the happiest years of her life. If the woman in your life is having difficulty, she needs your help. Be there for her. You won't regret it.

Thanks for reading.
Jan
Copyright © Jan Tincher - All Rights reserved http://www.tameyourbrain.com DISCLAIMER: Jan Tincher and/or *Tame Your Brain!* do not guarantee or warrant that the techniques and strategies portrayed will work for everyone. The techniques and strategies are general in nature and may not apply to everyone. The techniques and strategies are not intended to substitute for obtaining medical advice from the medical profession. Always consult your own professionals before making any life-changing decisions.

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